60 reasons why I do not play covers:

1. I know how to write my own songs
2. I do not work for ground control, and I have never met Major Tom
3. I do not ask dumb questions like, “Have you ever seen the rain?”
4. I have never picked up a Sweet Hitchhiker
5. I have never felt like a Free Bird, and Alabama is not my sweet home
6. Alice Cooper might still be eighteen, but I am not
7. I can not thank God I’m a country boy because I am a city boy
8. I have never been able to kiss the sky, nor do I care to
9. I am not Iron Man
10. The answer is not blowin’ in the wind
11. Sunshine on my shoulders does not make me happy; It makes me sweaty and uncomfortable
12. I have never been in a white room with black curtains at any station
13. I will not confess to shooting the sheriff when I did not
14. Yes, I'm lonely, but I do not wanna die
15. I have never been to the USSR, so I can not honestly say that I am back there
16. I have never seen smoke on the water or fire in the sky
17. I do not know anyone who has ever bought a stairway to Heaven
18. I will not tell you that you know I can dance when I know that I can not
19. I do not just wanna make love to you; I would rather have a more meaningful relationship
20. I can not honestly tell you that I know what it sounds like when doves cry
21. I have never seen purple rain
22. Mississippi is not ruled by a queen, and she would not know what I mean anyway
23. I am not a voodoo child
24. No, I do not want you to go ahead and give me a breakdown
25. I am never glad all over
26. The judge does not want to hear, "Well she was just 17, and you know what I mean!"
27. I would not like to be in an octopus's garden
28. I am not learning to fly, and I am not planning to
29. My papa was not a Rolling Stone...He didn't even play an instrument
30. Honesty is not a lonely word; it has me for company
31. I was not around when Jesus Christ had his moment of doubt and faith
32. I am not Jumpin' Jack Flash
33. Maybe I am not amazed at the way you're with me all the time because you're not
34. I will not wake Maggie up because I think I have something to say to her
35. I have never worked on Maggie's farm or anyone else's farm
36. I do not know anyone named Mandy
37. I am not bad to the bone
38. I do not snort whiskey or drink cocaine
39. I have not been through a million girls, loved them, and left them alone
40. I do not want or need a whole lotta love... Just a little bit will do
41. My angel is not a centerfold
42. I am not knockin' on Heaven's door...at least not anytime soon I hope
43. I been up and I been down, but I've never been to Dallas, Texas or Hollywood
44. I am not a teenaged Frankenstein
45. I am not an astronaut, so I will not see you on the dark side of the moon
46. I am not comfortably numb
47. I have never given my phone number to anyone named Rikki
48. I am not a rocket man
49. I would not see a doctor who would tell me to put the lime in the coconut
50. I can live even if living is without you
51. I am not sitting in an English garden waiting for the sun
52. I was not born to be wild
53. I am not PROUD to be an American. I just happened to be born here
54. I do not have any babies named Bebopalula
55. I do not want everybody to come together right now over me
56. I am not truckin'
57. I don't think I love you; I know I do
58. It is not my responsibilty to tell you to get back to where you once belonged. I do not work for Immigration.
59. I've never been to Baton Rouge, and I never hung out with Bobby McGee
60. Everyone has already heard these songs, but they have not heard mine.





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